Current mood: blissful

Aloha everyone,

Greetings from sunny Waikiki!
It was Mark Twain who wrote: "In my nostrils still lives the breath of flowers that perished twenty years ago."
It is really true. As I write this, the scent is mixed with Kona coffee and sweet Portuguese bread I am feeding the adorable red cardinals on my hotel room balcony. As I write this, I am watching dolphins play in the surf from my hotel room right on the beach. For those who haven't been reading my blogs (and why haven't you??) I am here under slightly false pretenses. Yes, me and my BFF won a five day trip for two to Waikiki - for the pleasure of being pummeled with time share property purchases.
Well, ahem...it's a political hot potato this issue in the islands. With tourism down, hotel operators are now selling hotel rooms, which will still be rented out but all will be privately owned.
Last night, my BFF Clare and I were invited to our first Honolulu dinner party and we were very excited.
We boned up on local issues - the hotel situation, the death of all but two inter-island airlines and the growing problem of drought on the big island affecting the taro industry.
Hawaii without poi?
Inconceivable!
After removing our shoes at the door (as is the custom in the the islands) we had no idea we were attending a Yakudoshi, a Japanese birthday celebration and I was full of questions.
But what was the main topic of interest among our hosts?
Sex and the City. As in the movie, whoch comes out Friday. Everybody wanted to know if we had seen it since we live in Los Angeles and we must see everything eons before everybody else.
Clare and I looked at each other. We haven't seen it, but we're as interested as the next fan...which led to the Which Character Are You? game.
The birthday boy, Jimmy-San, aged 60, was covered in red strips of fabric and paper, (it's a good luck thing) but it didn't seem to be bringing him much happiness.
"They're all sluts of the first order!" he shrieked.
"No, no," the woman ganged up on him, protesting. "They're wonderful!"
Clare, who to my way way of thinking is a Charlotte thinks I am a Carrie, even though I am a man.
"You don't think I'm a Stanford? The token gay best friend?"
"No. You're always bloody writing," she snapped in that clipped British way of hers. "And you wear crazy clothes. Although, thank bloody God you don't wear any of the stupid hats."
Geez...was she ever grouchy. Wait until I let loose that she unleashed her inner Samantha on her date with our disgusting tour operator Justin last night...
Speaking of Samantha, I noticed that not one woman revealed herself as one.
I write like a Samantha, but I would have to admit to being more of a Carrie with a dash of Miranda thrown in. I'm the chosen party pooper, I admit. I can rain on a friend's foolish romantic parade faster than a tropical shower.
"You think Justin will call me when we go back to L.A?" Clare asked me several times.
"No, I don't."
See what I mean?
Most of the men felt absurdly resentful of Sex and the City.
When pushed, a couple of single, straight men looking for sex in this Hula Moon City lamented that the TV series has given women a false sense of expectation.
"They all think guys show up in limos and take them to the hottest restaurants. Thanks that that series, I worry about having the wrong colored credit card, clothing labels, the size of my penis and ordering an unfashionable cocktail,"the cutest guy at the table said.
Over dinner (the usual melange of yummy island food - coconut fish and rice, poi (The water! The water!) and barbecued vegetables, we tried to convince these hotties that women have always expected a bit of romancing...a bit of class on a date.
In the days before the Internet, women didn't have anonymous sex with nine year old boys posing as mature male adults. A gentleman called on a lady and a good time was had by all. Usually. And in times gone by, there was a build up to sex...in every city. When I first started dating it was called 'bases.' Which base did you get to?
So in the interests of research, I have to ask, which Sex and the City character are you?

Aloha oe,

A.J.

Currently watching : Step into Liquid Release date: 2004-04-20