Current mood: happy

Hi Everyone and Happy 4th of July!!!
Those lovely lasses here at Sensual Secrets have asked me to blog every other Friday and here I am, reporting for blog duty - and I don't think I can top my tale today so here it is verbatim...
So today amma gonna talk about sex and lies. Now why do these two things go hand in hand? I dunno...if I could answer that I'd be a rich guy!
So last night I had my own genuine 100% "Sex and the City" moment. I went to a 'mixer' party and the theme was one man's trashy guy is another man's dream boat. We were all told to bring a guy we used to date and toss them into the dating pool and see if somebody else liked them better. This has to be the worst idea anybody every dreamed up...except that the girl who threw this event is a rabid fan of "SATC" and copied it.
Oh, bad move.
Mixing gay and straight is confusing enough in real life, let alone in a small, crowded, overly hot room being blasted by a very loud karaoke machine.
I watched guys mingle, with ghastly margaritas in their sweaty hands saying, "Gay? Straight?" before settling down for the obligatory 20 question chat.
I took my best friend (not a former lover since he is straight) Roban, a building contractor by trade and the poor guy spent most of the night under the kitchen sink trying to straighten the mess created by some clueless guest who popped an entire avocado down the garbage disposal.
For those who have never been to a mixer event, it sort of works like a free speed dating service. The rule of thumb is that the dumber the chicks sound, the luckier they get. Remember Miranda's scene in "SATC?"
It's surprising how many stewardesses were in that room last night. A few got caught out saying they work for Aloha Airlines which went belly up two months ago, but they apparently got points for trying because they all went home with fresh meat in tow.
The opposite is true for men. You're supposed to sound smart. I caught one guy I happen to know is a waiter/actor passing himself off as a doctor.
"Why not?" he asked when he got outed. "Doctor Phil never even went to medical school and he's got a TV show!"
I don't know how lucky he got. I was too busy tuning into some embarrassing conversations around me. As the margarita mixes got cruder, the party chat took increasingly sharp turns. Check this one out:
He: I'm a screen writer.
She: Oh yeah? And what have you written? [snicker] Anything I might have seen?
He: Well, I don't know...
She: Yeah...right. Everybody's got a screenplay, right?
He: Well, mine were actually made. They made some money actually.
She: You don't say [trying hard not to laught now]. You don't look like a successful screen writer. What did you write?
He: Mad Max 1, Mad Max 2 and Mad Max 3.
She looked like she got slapped in the face with a wet tennis shoe.
He went off in search of friendlier fire...
Roban came up from under the sink beet-red but happy to find a pert, perky blonde very impressed with his manly, manual dexterity.
He blushed as she complimented his skills and I prayed she was looking for a boyfriend and not a handyman.
It was the most action he's had in two years though so I left him in the hands of the gods and goddesses of handymen and I turned to the guy next to me. He had just walked in and was carrying a bottle of champagne.
"Hi, I'm Steve," he said.
I wrestled with my conscience. I eyeballed that champagne. I eyeballed his perfect physique and the fact that he seemed sane.
I gave him my best grin.
"Hi, I'm AJ," I said. "And I'm a nuclear physicist!"

LOL

AJ

Currently listening : Lilo & Stitch 2: Island Favorites Release date: 2005-08-30