Current mood: pirate

Hi Everyone,

I managed to get another free three day trip to Honolulu out of the same idiots, er, I mean gentle and charming folk, who still have not figured out that I DO NOT have 72 children and am never, ever as in NEVER EVER gonna be buyin' a timeshare. Unless I get hit by a bus and my dog is given legal custody of my brain, I shall manfully resist. She is likely to sign up because she never met a beach she didn't like and because she is an easy sell...me, not so much.

But yesterday I got a phone call from that loon Justin who ran the last trip. I grabbed a friend and we hopped on the plane and here we are. This time we are in a hotel. The new thing here in Waikiki is they are selling off hotel rooms. It works exactly like a time share, except it's a hotel room.

I don't know, I'm not a guy who likes to share...know what I'm saying? I don't share my fries, my ice cream cone (except the dog gets the last lick) and I don't share my men (not knowingly, anyway)...and as for buying a hotel room I won't have more than four week' access to...I cannot (to paraphrase Henry Rollins) get behind that.

They keep telling us it's the same but better but so far the room is dirty (the last occupant's massive turd was doing the back stroke in the toilet bowl when we walked in) and there are long black hairs in the shower and peanuts on the carpeting...but the view is frickin' spectacular so I refuse to switch rooms. I want them to come and actually clean it, not dazzle me with their verbal footwork. If I want b/s, I'll call up my Know it All date from the other night...

Still, it's fun, even though I am already sick of the hard sell meetings. It's a beautiful day and it's Saturday at Queen's Beach tonight. I have no idea what the movie is they'll be playing, but it's free and gosh darn, I'm a nice guy and people like me!

Boy...my brain is pickled. Where was I? Oh yeah...my friend Joe came with me this time and Justin's crew must be wondering about me since I am with a guy this time...they probably think my sex life is way more interesting than it is. Anyway, it's time to go buy food for the picnic on the beach. I think about food a lot in case you're wondering...I think I'll get 'em to hold the spiders though!

Aloha oe and Happy Saturday to y'all!

A.J.

Currently watching : Hawaii Five-O - The Second Season Release date: 2007-07-31